A Reddit user faced a dilemma when her Trans sister came out, and their parents used the wrong pronouns. Unsure whether to correct them, she sought advice, sparking divided opinions among Redditors.
Elsa’s sister, Anna, recently came out as Trans, and most of the family has been supportive.
The Family Went to the Clinic
A couple of weeks ago, the closest family members, including Elsa’s parents, Elsa, and their oldest sister, accompanied Anna to the gender clinic to ask questions and learn more about transitioning.
Her Sister Wanted Them to Use New Pronouns
During the meeting, Anna expressed her desire for the family to start using feminine pronouns to aid in her social transition. She also mentioned that once she figures out a name, she would like them to use that as well.
It Would Take Time to Adjust
The family agreed to this request, although their parents acknowledged that adjusting might take some time, given their long history of using masculine pronouns for 35 years. Despite this, they were willing to give it a try.
Don’t Correct Each Other
Also, Anna mentioned that she did not want the family to correct each other, hoping they would “police themselves.”
The Parents Were Using the Wrong Pronouns
Elsa overheard her parents’ conversations and noticed they were not putting in much effort to change the pronouns when discussing her sister.
They Used “He”
Although nothing directly harmful or disrespectful was being said, they continued to use “he” instead of “her.”
She Always Used the Required Pronouns
When Elsa joined in these conversations, she deliberately used her sister’s name or “she,” but it seemed like her parents did not even realize that they were still using masculine pronouns.
She Wants to Correct Them
As a result, Elsa is now feeling the urge to correct them because it appeared that they were not trying, but doing so would mean going against her sister’s own wishes for her transition.
Your Sister’s Wishes Are Clear
Elsa turned to Reddit seeking advice, and several Redditors said she would be wrong.
One Reddit user wrote, “Whilst your intentions are good and you’re trying to protect your sister, she made her wishes clear, and you’re disrespecting her and those wishes by not following them.”
She Asked You Not To
Another Redditor commented, “Yes, because the person in your life most directly affected has asked you not to.”
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