In a recent Reddit post, a user found himself at a crossroads when his sister asked him to be a part of her upcoming wedding as a bridesmaid. Here’s the full story.
He Is Trans
The Original Poster (OP) is a 21-year-old transgender man.
Living Between Identities
OP’s family is aware of his identity as man, but the rest of his family sees him as nothing more than a tomboy.
He Was Himself in Other Family Weddings
Previous family events, including a cousin’s wedding, allowed OP to express himself through masculine clothing without any negative reactions from his family.
He Thought He Would Have the Freedom
With this understanding, OP naturally assumed he would have the same freedom to dress in a way that aligns with his gender identity during his sister’s wedding.
Her Sister Wanted Him to Wear Feminine Clothing
However, when his sister began sharing dress options for the bridesmaids, OP initially assumed there would be alternative options for him as a Trans male. But, he soon realized that his sister expected him to wear a jumpsuit or a dress.
He Was Not Comfortable
This presented a challenge as he did not feel comfortable in feminine clothing and preferred a more masculine presentation.
He Shared His Concerns
He expressed his concerns and discomfort to his sister, emphasizing his desire to find a suit or masculine attire that would allow him to feel authentic and aligned with his gender identity during the wedding.
His Sister Didn’t Consider It
Despite these conversations, OP’s sister dismissed his concerns and delayed further discussions.
Left in Silence
This lack of communication from his sister left OP feeling unheard and uncertain about his place in the wedding party.
He Asked His Mother
OP even reached out to his mother, who confirmed that she had anticipated him opting for a suit, considering his consistent masculine appearance.
He Sent Pictures and Videos to His Sister
OP tried sending his sister outfits he thought worked and were cohesive with the wedding party and sent her videos of other transgender and even non-binary people being in their siblings’ bridal parties, but she never responded and just left him on read.
His Sister Was Not Traditional
OP mentioned that his sister is not traditional in any way, and the idea of a man in her bridal party is not an issue to her, as she has mentioned that she was considering one of her cis male friends to be in the bridal party too.
Now OP is thinking about whether he would be in the wrong if he showed up in a suit.
He Asked if His Idea Was Wrong
He took to Reddit to ask whether his idea was wrong and several Redditors sided with him saying that his decision is not wrong.
His Sister Is Being Inconsiderate
One Reddit user wrote, “Your sister seems to just be hoping that you’ll bend to her will if she ignores the issue long enough.”
Another Redditor commented, “She asked you, her brother, to be at her wedding party, she can’t ask you to pretend not to be her brother.”
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The post “I Am Not a Woman!” – Trans Man Forced Into Bridesmaid Role, Pressured to ‘Act as a Woman’ at His Sister’s Wedding first appeared on Fistful of Dollars.
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / kuzmaphoto. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.
Source: Reddit