She turned to Reddit after her husband told her she had made the wrong decision in turning down a promotion at work.
She Turned Down the Job and He Was Upset
The Original Poster (OP) turned to Reddit for reassurance after she turned down a promotion and her husband was upset by her decision.
She’s Financially Stable
OP is a software engineer, and her husband works in construction management.
Despite coming from a financially challenged background, OP feels grateful for their current financial stability, as she earns $120k while her husband earns $80k.
She Thought It Over
When her boss offered her a Program Manager position, OP took the opportunity to meet with the current and previous Program Managers to gain some insight into the position.
They Are Earning Less Than Her Current Salary
The current Program Manager disclosed that he did not receive a raise after accepting the promotion. At the same time, the previous Program Manager was repeatedly denied raises despite earning less than OP’s current salary.
He Said She Should Take the Job Anyway
Later that evening, OP confided in her husband about the Program Manager promotion offer and expressed her uncertainties about accepting it.
After some discussion, her husband encouraged her to take the promotion for the sake of her resume.
She Asked Her Boss About the Salary
The following day, OP inquired with her boss about the salary for the new position. He informed her that the matter would be addressed by HR during the next review cycle.
More Work, but Not More Money
OP had heard that this often results in the minimum possible salary offer, and given that the market value for the role was between $150-180k, she felt she would be significantly undervalued if she accepted the offer.
She began to question whether accepting the promotion would be a poor decision.
She Was Grateful for the Offer, But…
OP told her boss that she was grateful for the offer but was not comfortable taking on any role until the terms of employment, including compensation, were more fully defined.
However, her boss informed her that his hands were tied as HR would not renegotiate until the next quarter.
He Was So Upset With Her!
When she got home, she informed her husband that she had declined the promotion.
Her husband was surprisingly upset about it and said that they should have discussed it first and that he did not agree with her decision.
She Tried to Make Him Understand
OP responded by saying that she was aware of the financial situation at her job and that taking the promotion would double her workload for nothing.
He Still Thought It Would Be Good
Her husband argued that the promotion would be good for her resume and open up other management job opportunities, allowing her to negotiate for a higher salary elsewhere.
She Explained to Her Husband
OP expressed to her husband that she didn’t want to take on the Program Manager promotion offered to her by her boss because the compensation had not been defined.
Disagreement on the Long-Term Effects
OP told her husband that she preferred being an individual contributor and didn’t want to take on more responsibilities for nothing.
He Accused Her of Being Selfish
Her husband became upset and accused OP of being selfish and naive for not wanting to work hard for a salary review.
She Defended Her Decision
OP defended her decision by stating that she had tried that approach before, and it didn’t work out. She asked if she was in the wrong for declining the promotion.
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