A busy mom took to Reddit after she cut her own mother’s allowance when the older woman refused to watch her grandchild. It’s getting tougher and tougher to find free childcare these days! Here’s the full story.
They Added On
OP is a 34-year-old woman living in an expensive city with her 35-year-old husband. The couple had their first and only child last year.
They Were Always Home
During that first year of the baby’s life, OP and her husband were able to stagger their time off work so that one of them was always there with the child.
Now They Have to Leave
But now they’ve both run out of leave and vacation, and OP has been trying to arrange for childcare during the day.
Mom Said No Way
OP first turned to her 56-year-old mother to see if she could watch their baby. But her mom didn’t want to be tied down and said no.
She Had to Figure It Out
That was fine with OP, since her mom can do what she wants with her life. But that meant OP had to find an alternative.
It Would Cost a Fortune
So OP and her husband started researching local daycares. They were all super expensive, but the couple finally found one they liked.
They Had to Make Some Cuts
But OP and her husband couldn’t afford childcare in addition to their normal expenses. That meant some things had to get cut.
Mom Was on the Chopping Block
One of their obvious monthly expenses involved OP’s mom.
She Never Worked
OP’s mom and dad had been married for 28 years before he decided to leave her for a younger woman. Because they were very religious and conservative, mom had stayed home from work all those years.
He Left Her Broke
So when her husband abandoned her, OP’s mom was pretty much broke, with few job prospects.
They Picked Her Up
OP and her husband were glad to step in and help pay her living expenses. To do that they gave her a hefty monthly allowance.
They Couldn’t Afford Her
That was all fine until OP had to take on the extra expense of daycare. She and her husband decided to cut her mom’s monthly stipend in half.
They Gave Her Some Time
OP’s mother was frantic when her daughter told her that half her monthly income would soon be gone. But OP told her they wouldn’t make the cut for 3 months, to give her a chance to figure out how she was going to cover the loss.
She Was Being Punished
That extra time was little comfort to OP’s mom, who said her daughter was punishing her for saying no to providing childcare.
But It Was Just About the Money
OP explained the situation and told her mom that they just couldn’t afford to keep everything the same and add daycare on top of it. It was just finances, not punishment in any way.
She Laid on the Guilt
But her mom wasn’t having any of it. She told OP she was selfish and really laid on the guilt.
Little Sister Was Mad
The mom also told OP’s sister about the blow up, and she called OP to chew her out for abandoning their mother.
She Still Lived at Home
OP turned that attack around, though, and pointed out that her sister still lives at home with their mother. OP suggested the sister could kick in more money to help mom.
There’s No Other Choice
In the end, OP feels bad that her mom is in a tough situation, but she really does have to make some budget cuts. And she also doesn’t think she needs to keep supporting her sister like she has since her parents’ divorce.
Childcare Is Expensive
Redditors overwhelmingly support OP’s decision about cutting her mom’s allowance, and they agree she really has no choice. Many of them know firsthand how expensive childcare can be.
Many commenters think it’s time for OP’s mom to pick herself up and get back into the workforce, even if that means starting with an entry level job.
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Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Roman Samborskyi. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.